We finally went to the streets today in what seems like forever since we last went. I sit here thinking about today and honestly I sit here with my mind blank. I know without a doubt that God was ever present today I just can't find the words to explain Him....if there are even words that exist.
Today was very two sided. There were some that were totally exhausting-ly grouchy. They were hot, they were tired, they were hungry and it was an end to one more day on the streets. Same old crap, different, hotter day. And in that same second of frustration, that same moment of exhaustion, breathing in the same hot air was someone filled with gratitude and thankfulness that would say thank you on behalf of everyone. They would come up to us and shake our hands or give us a hug and tell us how much they appreciated us coming out and if no one said thank you they were saying it for them.
We by no means go out there to get patted on the back or to puff up our egos by "doing good to the least of these" and we never expect a thank you or anything else in return. But when someone goes out of their way to tell you...it means a lot.
I honestly love going to the streets and seeing our friends out there. It serves as a check and balance system for my own life. I juggle two lives...one at work filled with people trying to keep up with the Jones' and living well beyond their means to do it and one filled with people that are just trying to survive another day. I relate and connect so much more with the people who struggle in life; people that experience suffering. Rather than those who put on their plastic smiles and face each day suppressing internal struggles.
When we were in front of the Stew Pot today there was a man there that I started talking to named Ernie. He said he recognized us from the walk in (aka Austin Street Shelter). Just before we went to the Stew Pot we were just down the street (literally 1/2 a block from the Stew pot) and we were in a circle praying for some of our good friends and it started out with Scottie and I and 3 other people but the circle just kept growing as people walked up. By the time I closed my eyes to pray there were about 10 people in the circle. As I was praying people kept coming up and just standing behind the circle and bowing their heads and joining in the prayer. Obviously Ernie was one of those that had stopped because when I was talking to him he looked at me and said "I just want to thank you for praying for people like us". I looked at him and shook my head and said Ernie I'm no different than you, I'm just like you. He looked back at me like I was from a different planet and said well thank you anyways.
What does that mean..."people like us"? Has our society dehumanized him enough that he's now less human than I am just because he's on the streets and I, at this moment in life, am lucky enough to have a roof over my head?
I was totally taken back by his statement. When does one human become "more human" than another? How does that happen? When does that happen?
I feel more like "us" than I do "them".
I have most definitely been in the valley before. A dark, scary, lonely valley and God has allowed me to be on this mountain top of life for the time being. But I don't want to get to far away from the valley that I forget what it looks like...what it feels like...even what it smells like. From my personal experiences in life I feel like God hangs out more in the valley than he does on the mountain. I know for certain that the same God that is in the valley is the same God on the mountain top. I just felt closer to him when I was in the valley.
Maybe that's why I enjoy going out to the streets; it gives me the opportunity to be in the valley and in the presence of my maker as He allows me time on this mountain top. The thing is I know this time is limited and short lived. I know for sure I will again be in my own valley needing others to cry out in my behalf. That's life.....life as we know it anyways. A series of valleys and mountains. When you're in the valley you feel like you have no way out of it and when you're on the mountain you never see the edge before you fall off of it.
People like us.....out of all the things that happened today those words are the only thing I can think about and I still to this moment can't wrap my mind around them.
I was reading the Street Zine (a homeless newspaper) on the way home and there is an article in the July issue that addresses Dallas's decision to have a tougher panhandling ordinance. This is a part of the article that intrigued me and I thought it was brilliantly said.
"The greatest tragedy of this ordinance is its contribution to the myth that the presence of the poor equals a threat to our safety. This is simply not true.
Our safety is threatened not by the poor, but by evil. Evil is present along the entire spectrum of society. It is present in middle-class neighborhoods in Carrollton, where a man recently shot his family and himself. It is present in University Park, where drugs and alcohol continue to claim the lives of students at SMU. It is present in southeast Dallas, where a 15-year old was killed in a gang related shooting last week. It is present in too many churches, where a blind eye is turned to abuse.
It is indeed present among the homeless population, but no more there than the rest of society. It is also present in us when we see another human being as a threat simple because that person is poor" ~ Rev. Joseph J. Clifford, Pastor of First Presbyterian Church, Dallas.
Seems like all of us are "people like us".
Something to think about.....
Britney & Scottie
